Toddlers have chub e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e. They have chubby tummies, chubby legs, chubby hands, and chubby cheeks on both ends. And they use this chub in the same way criminals use deadly weapons – to get anything they want. If used correctly, the toddler chub effect can make grown men cry. Toddlers would rather plaster the walls with their food than eat it. They’d rather flush anything down the toilet than actually use it (especially cell phones). And they’d rather be naked all the time – the better to use their chub. Toddlers hate car seats. Toddlers like to run and scream… at home, in the store, in the car and get very angry when said running is impeded by said car seat. Toddlers have big eyes that watch everything you do. They will ignore the thing you are teaching them by endless repetition and immediately repeat the cuss word you say once. Toddlers do everything with all their heart which is why it is utterly impossible to give them anything less than all of yours.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Toddlers
OR THE CHUB EFFECT
Toddlers have chub e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e. They have chubby tummies, chubby legs, chubby hands, and chubby cheeks on both ends. And they use this chub in the same way criminals use deadly weapons – to get anything they want. If used correctly, the toddler chub effect can make grown men cry. Toddlers would rather plaster the walls with their food than eat it. They’d rather flush anything down the toilet than actually use it (especially cell phones). And they’d rather be naked all the time – the better to use their chub. Toddlers hate car seats. Toddlers like to run and scream… at home, in the store, in the car and get very angry when said running is impeded by said car seat. Toddlers have big eyes that watch everything you do. They will ignore the thing you are teaching them by endless repetition and immediately repeat the cuss word you say once. Toddlers do everything with all their heart which is why it is utterly impossible to give them anything less than all of yours.
Toddlers have chub e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e. They have chubby tummies, chubby legs, chubby hands, and chubby cheeks on both ends. And they use this chub in the same way criminals use deadly weapons – to get anything they want. If used correctly, the toddler chub effect can make grown men cry. Toddlers would rather plaster the walls with their food than eat it. They’d rather flush anything down the toilet than actually use it (especially cell phones). And they’d rather be naked all the time – the better to use their chub. Toddlers hate car seats. Toddlers like to run and scream… at home, in the store, in the car and get very angry when said running is impeded by said car seat. Toddlers have big eyes that watch everything you do. They will ignore the thing you are teaching them by endless repetition and immediately repeat the cuss word you say once. Toddlers do everything with all their heart which is why it is utterly impossible to give them anything less than all of yours.
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